Meet Todd Blankenship. On the surface, there doesn’t seem to be anything unusual about him, other than his obsession with collectible meats. He’s an average young man in his late twenties. He has an average job, receives average income, attends church averagely, and has incredibly average looks. Underneath the...

Herp Humphries was just like any other twenty-five year old, other than having a really strange first name.  All that changed late last week when he sat down in a local coffee shop to listen to his favorite theological podcast. “I had some time off and just decided to...

Sam Sagacwap was struck with a brilliant idea last week. Calling himself a “Christian Stoner” and “Connoisseur of the Plant Commonly Known as The Weed,” Sam realized he has many friends who also participate in marijuana-related activities. These include creating clay, stop-motion videos and using binoculars as glasses. “I...

A shocking and horrifying secret was revealed earlier this week after the remains of noted Scottish author, poet, and minister George MacDonald was exhumed. Suspicions had long surrounded the Christian mystic and his death — regarding what exactly, no one was quite sure.  One thing that everyone was quite...

With the recent hue and cry over President Donald Trump’s immigration policy, two above-average celebrities are finally taking matters into their own wrinkled hands. Oprah Winfrey and Rob Bell have teamed up to give every single refugee the ability to buy their own personal raft full of some of...

Sources in Hollywood inform us that the hugely popular Christian actor, Kirk Cameron, is taking on a silver-screen comedy classic: Anchorman. “I’ve never actually seen the original,” Cameron is reported to have confessed, “I would never stoop to that level of comedy. I do understand that it’s quite humorous, however....

“It all started innocuously enough,” said Margie Meatzenkampf. “Then before I knew what was happening, pastor Bell’s eyes rolled back and his hair instantly grew into a luscious, curly fro. It was quite frightening.” Margie is an 80-year old devotee of both Bell and Oprah, but nothing could have...

This is a simple question that demands an answer because, well, most of us use it everyday to search sports teams and hairstyles. After an unbelievable, four hour-long, in-depth investigation, we think we have an answer for you. The answer is: No. Well, yes. Ummm –maybe. After hours of...

There are many different ways to raise a boy or girl, and almost none of them produce the results we hope for. Ten’s of people have used NEEPS to raise darling, handsome children. Here’s how to do it: 1. Neatly place your child in a vat of “Tough Love.” When your...