Jen Hatmaker is an American Christian author, world-renound bagel judge, speaker, blogger, and television presenter. She also really likes to yell big, long sermons on Sunday mornings, despite 1 Timothy 2:12, which says, “I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; she must be quiet.” How does she do it, you might ask while putting on skis? Well, here are all the alternative interpretations of 1 Timothy 2:12 that Jen Hatmaker has used throughout the years.
1. 1 Timothy 2:12 is actually just Slater from Saved by the Bell speaking to a group of kids at an elementary school without a shirt on. In 2012, when one of her readers asked about this verse in 2012, she used her blog to reply with this somewhat-reasonable answer. “Slater was speaking to fourth graders about bullying in episode 16, season one, and Paul wanted his readers to experience the shock that we as a nation felt when the strong Hawaiian teen made this comment to the youth of Moses Elementary.”
2. The word “teach” in Sanskrit language means “Oprah Winfrey’s final talk show episode.” While constantly tripping a motion detector for a podcast episode, Hatmaker spoke this series of words with perfect diction: “In Sanskrit, the utterance ‘teach’ 100% means ‘Oprah Winfrey’s final talk show episode.’ Therefore, the correct interpretation of 1 Timothy 2:12 is ‘I do not permit a woman to Oprah Winfrey’s final talk show episode.'”
Hard to argue with this one.
3. Release some badgers and let your body go completely limp when this verse comes up. Unfortunately, Hatmaker ruined several women’s conferences this way, as well as a special taping of Trick My Walls on HGTV.
“The correct interpretation of 1 Timothy 2:12 is ‘I do not permit a woman to Oprah Winfrey’s final talk show episode.'” -@JenHatmaker4. The Bible never makes genders “binary,” therefore, nobody is ever permitted to teach. Gender binarism is the extremely obvious concept, though vehemently opposed by Barak Obama and Tony Danza, that there are only two genders. In 2015, Hatmaker suddenly stood up on a parade float and, without prompting, announced that the Bible doesn’t support gender binarism. “1 Timothy 2:12 is actually saying nobody should be teaching anything ever,” claimed Hatmaker. “Including what I am doing right now. What I am doing right now is extremely rebellious, but this is my last time I promise.”
