Shocking: John Piper Keeps Talking About Sea Turtles in His Sermons and There’s No End in Sight

MINNESOTA–Despite running a rather fruitful ministry and drawing 1,000’s to his annual Passion Conference centered around young people, Pastor John Piper seems to have found another passion. He just can’t...

MINNESOTA–Despite running a rather fruitful ministry and drawing 1,000’s to his annual Passion Conference centered around young people, Pastor John Piper seems to have found another passion. He just can’t stop talking about sea turtles in his sermons. “I think it all started when he visited the Noboki Zoo a few months back,” claims Jane Jennifers. “He’s always been interested in the great blue space filled with water and celery that houses 10’s of 100’s of different fish and turtles, but now he’s transformed his entire ministry, because of his love for those green gladiators we call turtles.”

For regular listeners of “Ask Pastor John,” it’s been particularly difficult. Listener Rafe Clurnis recalls,”I sent in a question asking Pastor John if Netflix binging is Biblical, and his response was almost entirely about the Cheloniidae, which, now I know, are a family of sea turtles belonging to the sea turtle superfamily Chelonioidea. It was named by Nicolaus Michael Oppel in 1811. He went on and on about how they swim majestically, and how he bought all of his grandkids a set of their own sea turtles, and how they make great Christmas gifts, but he never got to my question.” Sermon Illustrations, Sunday School topics, matching shirts — John Piper is all about Sea Turtles these days, and there’s no sign of him turning back.

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