6 Things Every Children’s Sunday School Teacher Is Tired of Hearing

We asked one-hundred Sunday School teachers to name seven things they are really tired of hearing. Here’s what we came up with: 1. “Can you subscribe to my YouTube...

We asked one-hundred Sunday School teachers to name seven things they are really tired of hearing. Here’s what we came up with:

1. “Can you subscribe to my YouTube channel?”

“I am nearing the twilight years of my life, and teaching 3rd grade Sunday School class has been one of the highlights of my beautiful existence. I just hate when the kids ask me to subscribe to their lame YouTube channels. I am following 146 right now, and most of it is the same old junk about Wilt Chamberlain.” –Lynda Marcia, Donavan Covenant Church

2. “Beware the winter solstice.”

“The children are beautiful and respectful when they aren’t making international phone calls to Kim Jong-Il, but if one more child warns me of the impending ‘winter solstice,’ I’m going to scream into a brown bag.” –Grant Preim, Sicily Fellowship Church

3. “I am having a heart-attack.”

“It’s that heart-attack thing that the kids keep saying while we are reciting our memory verses. I’m totally fine with them warning me of a coming snow and the chilly weather that happens with winter solstice, but the continual statement, ‘I am having a heart-attack’ makes me want to quit.” –Bean Wetsmith, Doramoat Family Fellowship

4. “What is a book?”

“My first 6th grade Sunday School class had never looked at or smelled a book before. The next 20 years of my life was a carousel of students who didn’t know what a book was. I had to start every class with a short tutorial on what a book is and how to use it.” –Hunk Bread, New Jersey Wesleyan Church

5. “There is grape jelly smeared all over these complementary elephant tusks.”

“As all Sunday School teachers have done since the beginning of time, I have given a set of elephant tusks to the boy or girl with the best teeth and hair. To hear that one of them got grape jelly all over those tusks is like fingernails on a chalkboard.” –Treat Bunt, Burlington Baptist Church

6. “Why is everyone in your class in prison?”

“In 16-years of teaching Sunday School, five of my students have escaped without going to prison. This raises lots of questions, but I don’t like them.” –Judith Peeplehoron, Krinston Evangelical Bible Church

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